The Diagnosis

I was diagnosed with a Congenital Heart Defect, which is called an Anomalous Left Anterior Descending Artery. What that means is that instead of having two arteries on the left side of my heart and one on the right mine were reversed and the one on the right that should have been on the left was crossing over between the aorta and the pulmonary artery and getting pinched when my heart was stressed. Stressed due to physical exercise, emotional stress, anything that made my heart work harder or faster. I was born with this and over time as we grow older our arteries become less flexible and this lead to it being pinched, thus reducing the blood flow and causing me chest pain or angina, as well as other issues.

This led to my being in heart failure as the blood was not flowing well. My ankles and other areas of my body were swollen due to retained fluids, including internally. I was short of breath and yet when I went to the doctor thinking it was my asthma they said my lungs were clear. I had trouble breathing and coughed a lot when I lay down so slept with multiple pillows. I was coughing and wheezing, but my lungs were clear. I was tired or fatigued and yet my iron level was fine and my thyroid was fine. My heart often felt like it was racing, but that was normal (or so I was told). I was not eating much, but gaining weight, and feeling bloated. I was told to exercise more. We road almost 1,000 miles on the bike the summer prior to my diagnosis and I worked out, but I needed to exercise more? My brain was foggy, but I figured it was because I was tired, little did I know it was actually related to my heart. I was not sleeping well due to sleep disturbances. I had a few twinges in my shoulders and arms, but thought they were from over doing, or that the bike seat needed to be adjusted. I also put off a few chest twinges to stress as they came and went quickly and I was very stressed between work and my father dying of cancer. They never lasted so I never thought of them being related to my heart.

No one ever put all these symptoms together, even though I asked my doctors. I even asked about my circulation because my feet were always cold. Sure I had high blood pressure and retained some fluid so they gave me blood pressure med and water pills. It helped but the problems kept getting worse. I could not climb a flight of stairs without getting winded halfway up. It was not until the chest pains started and were bad that I went to the doctor and got real tests and real answers.

It is scary to think I could have died, just dropped dead. Only 1 to 2% of the population has this defect and most do not know about it until they are dead. Actually they do not know, their families do. I was one of the lucky ones. I had symptoms. It just took along time to get the doctors to put the pieces together. Please if you have symptoms, push for testing. Do not wait. I could have died if I had not finally had chest pain and would have been much better off if I would have gotten this diagnosed before I did. I was a walking zombie by the time I was diagnosed. My husband has said many times he does not know how I kept on going as bad a shape as I was in. I do not know how I kept on going either. I was just functioning on autopilot and really most of the last few months prior to my surgery are a blur as I was just there. I slept for hours on end just to make it through a day of work and came home to sleep.

In fact now that I think about it I probably should not have been driving because I know my reflexes were not their best. My brain was not focused and I was not my best at anything. I was just functioning on autopilot. I was in bad shape and am very lucky to be alive today. I was blessed and thank God for my being here and for my health.

Heart Blog 2

Heart Blog Two

I was scheduled to see two doctors and have an echocardiogram on May 12th for a consult at the University of Washington Regional Heart Center when Tom and I flew down May 11th, planning to return on the 16th. We knew that surgery was a possibility, but not much more than that at the time we left Anchorage. They told us to plan to stay at least one extra day in case they wanted more tests, and that there was the possibility they would do surgery. Since there was the possibility of surgery I went for first class. I was not coming home in the cattle car after being cut open.
We boarded our flight a little apprehensive, and looking for a solution to my problem on May 11th. The flight was pleasant and I relaxed some in the comfort of my seat. I also decided that I am not traveling in the cattle car again. It is first class all the way for me.
We landed in Seattle and got our rental car and joined the mob of vehicles on the road. I am so glad Tom was there to drive. I would have gotten off and turned around to go back home. There were so many cars. I complain about traffic in Anchorage and we have no traffic at all compared to Seattle. I was a nervous wreck and I was not even driving.
We arrived at the hostel, which was listed as one of the places giving discounts for patients of the University of Washington called the Collegian. It was a disaster. For one I requested a queen bed. I got a room with three single beds that were set up like a dormitory. It was dirty, and had a smell. There was animal dander of some kind in the room as it drove my allergies insane. Tom propped the two windows open so that the smell could dissipate and I got on the phone calling to complain. They could do nothing about any of the issues. I got out my list and called other places on it and found us a different place to stay the next night and for the rest of our time in Seattle. Tom moved the beds around so that two singles were side by side to make a double and we put our suitcases in the bathroom as it was the cleanest looking part of the room. We went out for a walk and to get something to eat. We found a coffee shop and had a chai and a coffee and asked where was a good place to eat. They young man there recommended a Greek place down the street a ways. We thanked him and set off with our drinks to explore the area. We were in the University area and found some interesting places. We also wandered into the University bookstore, which was huge compared to the University of Alaska Anchorages. I bought a few post cards and we got a map of the area and continued on our walk.
We stopped to eat at the place that was recommended to us. I had a Gyro and a side of Hummus. Tom has the Gyro platter and it was more than enough food. We got two pieces of Baklava to go and went to explore some more on our way back to the hole in the wall. Needless to say I did not sleep well that night and could not wait to get out of there and change to a clean hotel.
We headed off to the University Regional Heart Center for my appointments and some food. I saw Dr. Otto and her fellow, a doctor studying under her. She specializes in Congenital Heart Defects in Adults. Both of them told me that I was having surgery to correct my defect. There were not really any other options. They could try playing with my meds but that would not fix it. Surgery was the best option. Until that point surgery was an option that might be considered, but it was not definite. Now it loomed in front of me and it was scary as hell. I mean I knew that they would stop my heart and I could die, just not all the specifics at that point.
We changed hotels, and got some lunch before heading back to the University Regional Heart Center for my echocardiogram and to meet with the surgeon, Dr. Verrier.
The echocardiogram went smoothly and the technician was very nice, explaining to me what I was seeing on the monitor and what she was taking pictures of, etc... It was very interesting to watch and learn. I thought it was pretty cool to see the colors, which showed the blood flowing in and out of the chambers of my heart. It was relaxing and I was comfortable.
We sat and waited in the waiting room until time to see the surgeon and his fellow. They were both very nice and I felt comfortable with them.
Dr. Verrier is a professor of surgery and chief of the Division of Cardiothoracic Surgery. (http://www.medical.washington.edu/bios/view.aspx?CentralId=29515)
I was very comfortable with him and felt that my life was in capable hands. I felt reassured that I would be fine, even though the list of possible things that could happen was scary as hell. They went over all the things and explained them. The list included stopping my heart and putting me on the heart lung machine, that I could have a stroke or a heart attack, or I could die. My head was spinning at that point as I signed the papers for the surgery.
Dr. Verrier confirmed the diagnosis of a congenital heart defect, which is called an Anomalous Left Anterior Descending Artery. What that means is that instead of having two arteries on the left side of my heart and one on the right mine were reversed and the one on the right that should have been on the left was crossing over between the aorta and the pulmonary artery and getting pinched when my heart was stressed. Stressed due to physical exercise, emotional stress, anything that made my heart work harder or faster. I was born with this and over time as we grow older our arteries become less flexible and this lead to it being pinched, thus reducing the blood flow and causing me chest pain or angina, as well as other issues.
They gave us three dates for surgery all in the very near future and Tom said we would take the first one. They had said the sooner the better. One week until my life would change...I prayed for the better.
Every one in the clinic was helpful, friendly, and very upbeat. It helped make me feel calmer and more relaxed.
After signing my life away we headed out to the car to sightsee. Once we were in the car I started to cry as the fear of everything set in. I could die on the operating table, or become permanently disabled. I was scared to death and we still had to call my mother and my sons and tell them that surgery was no longer an option, it was a definite and scheduled in one week.
My mind was racing a million miles an hour with regard to if I died, and what would happen to my stuff and my family and, and, and,...
I think the hardest phone call for me was to my mother. I tried to be brave but ended up in tears. I let Tom tell the boys as I could not be brave for that.
I was looking forward to and yet dreading my surgery as I was afraid. We spent the next week relaxing and touring Seattle around pre-op appointments and blood work.

Heart Blog One

It has been a long while since I last sat and typed up an entry for my blog, but today my mind wandered over this last year, which has been one hell of a ride and not necessarily a good one. I started out in January with a relatively quiet month, my father was holding his own against the cancer and I thought, things were good. I was in for a shock in February when chest pains sent me to the ER. I was sure I was having a heart attack all the stress of work, my father's illness and my oldest son being up to his normal crap, meaning how stressed can I make my parents, was the cause. Little did I know at the time that I had a congenital heart defect, which had just decided to rear its head and let me know it was there.
Over several years I had been to the doctor's numerous times with complaints of something not being right, and not feeling well, tired, short of breath, swollen ankles and the like. Every time they said I was fine and sent me on my way, so I thought maybe it was for the most part in my head. During the summer I had pains in my shoulder and arm, but put the blame on the bike seat not being set right or the handlebars needing adjusted, etc...
In February my trip to the ER resulted in an overnight stay at the hospital and a nuclear stress test, which showed a blockage when my heart was stressed. A follow up with my doctor and my demanding it resulted in a referral to a cardiologist. During this time I had to delay a trip to visit my father. I set up the cardiology appointment and left town to visit my father. On March 4th I returned home to see the doctor on the 5th. He ordered further tests, a coronary catheterization and I thought, okay I have CAD like my mother. CAD is coronary artery disease and means that you have a blockage in your arteries due to a build up of plaque. After seeing the cardiologist and scheduling my cath. appointment I though I had a few days to relax. Life loves to kick you when you are down and it was during this time that my father passed away and I had to get back on a plane and fly to Kansas again. On the flight I was hit with another bout of severe chest pain and had to use the nitroglycerin tablets the doctor had given me. Talk about scary, trying having chest pains a few thousand miles in the air, when you have no idea where you are in relation to an airport. The pills did their job and the pain subsided, but I was certainly a little scared at that point.
After burying my father and dealing with all the emotional upheaval of a funeral, his sisters and brother, my stepsisters and their families, and then the long flight back home I returned to work for a few days.
I was ready the next week for my coronary cath. and the possibility of having a stent put in, but that was not the case.
If you have never had a coronary catheterization or an angioplasty, it is an experience that you learn from, literally. I got to watch on the monitor, after they cut into my leg, as they threaded a wire and tubing up through an artery in my leg to my heart. It was a little uncomfortable, more from the idea than from any real pain. I was relaxed from some good drugs that they injected me with to keep my calm. It was also very interesting to watch them thread the wire through.
After it was over and I was back in the outer patient area, resting on my back in bed, the doctor came out to chat with Tom and I. He said that my arteries were clear, but I had an unusual condition and he wanted to do more tests to confirm it. Of course, since I was a little out of it Tom asked the doctor to explain. My cardiologist told us that I have two arteries on the right and one on the left, where as most people have two on the left and one on the right. The problem was that the one on the left that should be on the right appeared to be being pinched by the aorta and the pulmonary artery. He wanted to do further tests to confirm this and to see what the options might be for fixing things.
I set up an appointment for two weeks down the road before we left for home. Once we were home I went to bed, doctor's orders. I was to rest for 3 days and then take it easy until Monday. Resting was easy, I was tired. I took it easy and made sure I stayed off my feet, as ordered. I mean they had put a wire up the artery into my heart and there were risks like bleeding or infection to consider.
I was feeling better on Saturday and was up for a while. On Sunday I took a nap and woke up with chest pain. I took my nitroglycerin and lay quiet for a while, then came up to eat Easter Dinner. When I came up stairs both Tom and Bryce were asking me if I was okay, and at first I said yes and wondered what why. Then I started to feel intense pain. If you have ever heard the expression about an elephant sitting on your chest, which is the best I can say. I felt as if something was pushing my chest wall in and crushing me, crushing all the air out of my lungs. It was horrifying and I was scared I was dying. I tried to say I was okay as I could see the intense fear in my son's eyes, but I could not lie. I thought I was going to die right there and then, and I am not exaggerating. I took another dose of nitro and Tom raced me to the ER, which is just 5 minutes away, and they immediately took me in and hooked me up to machines, drew blood, and started other tests. They gave me more nitro and kept a close watch over me. The pain eventually subsided and they determined that I had not had a heart attack, but they did not know what it was. I was monitored for a couple of hours and then sent home with instructions to come back if it reoccurred and to call my cardiologist in the morning. I went home to bed, with a very nervous husband, who must have asked me 200 times if I was feeling okay.
The next morning I called my cardiologist who moved up my CT scan to the next day. I spent that day resting at home and not doing anything that might set off another round of chest pain, though I had not been doing anything the day before either.
That Tuesday Tom took me to get my CT scan. The doctor said that I had an artery getting pinched and they wanted to do another test, an MRI, which I scheduled for the next week.
During all this time I was looking more and more energy, getting shorter of breath and feeling worse every day. I was working two days, resting a day, working two days, just to make it through the school week. I was scared and barely making it through it school day. I was not the best teacher for my students.
After all the tests were in the cardiologist talked to other cardiologists and a pediatric cardiovascular surgeon, as he had never seen my defect before, or at least not since med school thirty years ago. His recommendation was that I get a second opinion on what do from someone who specialized in adult congenital heart defects, outside of Alaska since there was no specialist up here.
I called and talked to someone at the University of Washington and had my records sent down, and waited to hear from them.

It Happened in Italy - The Book

A book that changed my mind or opened my eyes..........
There are many books I have read over the years but only a few that have had a deep impact on my life. One of those was It Happened in Italy. This book tells the story of what life was like for the Jews in Italy during World War II. The Jewish people in Italy were treated much more humanly and kindly than those in Germany, if they were under Italian rule. If the Germans had control they were still treated worse than animals. Thought I do have to say that not all the Italians were compassionate. There were Jews who died or were murdered in Italy at the hands of the Nazis.
In Campagna Italy there was an old convent that was used to house the Jewish people who were interred. They were allowed to practice their religion, and even had a synagogue and walk the streets of the town. When the Germans came Jewish people were sent out into the countryside to hide, and some even hid in ovens to survive. The Italians were a more compassionate people who showed that they could stand up to Hitler. They defied his orders to kill the Jews, and allowed them to live out the war. Many people of many different towns in Italy knew that there were Jewish families with false papers living in their towns, but they never said a word. One woman who told her story in the book talked about how she was the token Catholic in her family. She went to mass each week as the representative of her family to help hide the fact that they were Jewish. After the war her father went hack to apologize for lying to the people of town. They people told him that they knew all along he was Jewish. When he asked why that had not turned in his family they responded that it was because they were people. They were human beings. That is what the Nazis did not see. They did not see the Jewish people as human beings.
In other towns the Italian Jews returned after the war to find their home and all of their possessions still there, waiting for them. This was not true in other places in Europe. In other places people returned to nothing, no home, no photographs, nothing was left for them.
This book is well written and has much documentation which supports the stories included in the book. It also tells of the differences between the horror of the camps in Germany and the difference of the camps in Italy from the viewpoint of one couple who each survived, one in Germany and one in Italy, the wife who survived a year in Auschwitz and Ravensbruck and her husband who survived for six years in an Italy. She says and I quote from page 3 "The Italians treated them like human beings....No one could ever have survived six years in German concentration camps. That was impossible."
This book has shown that during a terrible time there were people with compassion who were willing to risk their lives to help others. It shows that man is not all bad and gives me faith that no matter how bad things may get, there are people who will help others to survive at the risk of their own lives. I pray that if I have to make the choice someday I have the courage to follow in the footsteps of the people of the many towns of Italy who helped the Jews in Italy survive.

Jury Duty

You know it is funny when you mention to people that you have been called for jury duty the response range from sympathetic to enthusiastic. One person told me they felt sorry for me. I asked why and they said because you have jury duty.
Jury duty is a civil duty. It is my responsibility, no my duty, as a citizen of this country. It is the responsibility and duty of every legal citizen in this country over the age of 18. The principle of a jury was established by King John of England when he signed the Magna Carta in 1215.
I feel that this is a privilege I have as a citizen of this country. I have a say in the law. I also believe that only God can truly judge, but punishment must be meted out to fit a crime and in our society we must do our duty to make sure that it does fit the crime and is not cruel and unusual punishment. There are times when people commit acts of such violence that they must be taken off the streets to protect innocent citizens and it our duty to make sure we are protected.
Many people feel that carrying a gun is the way to protect themselves, but I feel that violence begets violence. I do not believe in the death penalty, though there are times I do consider it might solve many problems. I feel that God is the only one who can truly met out such justice and if he feels that the time has come for someone to leave our world he will take them in his own way.
I do feel that I have a duty to step up when my number is called and serve my city, state, or country in the court room as a juror and to do so to the best of my ability.
I have served on a jury one time previously and it was a learning experience for me. I hope that I will gain more experience and knowledge in doing so again. I look forward to serving again as is my duty.

America's Downfall

I never liked President Bush, but then I didn't like President Clinton either. Hilary was a joke and no way were we ready for someone like her to try and tun our country. I do not think either party put its best foot forward during this election either. It was vote for which ever one I felt was the lesser of two evils. I did vote, and my husband and I canceled out each others votes, as we have done many times in the past.
It was not the time for a woman to win, though I believe a woman would do the best job, it is just that we have not found the right woman for the job. Personally, I think my mother would do a great job as she would go in and rid the government of all the trash and excess junk that appears to have been added over the years.
We are in the mist of a great war, one that looks be what will go down in history as WW III, the war to end all wars. Having a man with little knowledge and experience with regard to the military is not necessarily the best choice. That does not mean I feel that McCain was the best choice either, as he was lacking in other ways and experiences. I do think that there are others out there who have more experience in the ways of the military and with the economy who would have been better choices to run our country.
I asked many people why they voted the way they did and got a variety of interesting response including the following from my aunt.
She said she voted for Obama because she believes he will be assassinated and Biden will become president. She said she likes Biden, and thinks he will do a wonderful job. She didn't like either of the men running for office.
One of my students said she was voting for Obama because he was black. Now, realize that she is 18 and has no real experience with politics, but this is not a reason to vote for someone.
Another person I know voted for Obama because they want socialized medicine and that is what he preached. Others voted against him for the same reason. It is interesting when you talk to people how the reasons for or against someone or something have arguments that often go both ways, depending on where you stand and what you believe.
I do not like Bush, never have. I did not like his father either.
I am not sure that the timing is right for this man, Obama, to be president. I feel that we are asking for more problems than we know because of the election results, but only time will tell.
I am taking a wait and see attitude. It is not the time for racial issues to abound and I fear that they will ignite many fires across our great land. We are heading into a depression, all the signs are there and we need a true leader. We do not need a leader who will set up more welfare and public works programs that will still be draining our economy 60 years down the road like we have left over from what was then called the Great Depression.
I also know that if someone is stupid enough to assassinate Obama this country will erupt in to a great battle field. As one of my students put it, "We will have another civil war."

50

50, that sounds ominous. It is a big number that's for sure. Half a Century and as I look back at all the changes and how far we have come since I was born on this day in 1958 it seems extraordinary. I can remember when the year 2000 sounded like it was in the far, far, distant future and would never arrive and here it is 2008, almost 2009. We have come a long way from 1958. We have fought several wars, and the world has grown, not in land mass, but in countries and people. The Soviet Union split and the Berlin Wall fell. We put men on the moon and a space station in outer space. Society has begun to fall into a moral decline that is speeding toward an explosive end and the world is heading, or should I say spiraling into what may be a great depression.
As I look back on my life I think of things that stand out. Seeing Elvis in concert, his passing, traveling to many places as a military dependent and as an adult, marriage, raising two boys, earning my bachelors and my masters degrees in education. I also look at the inventions that have come about during my life time, desktop and then laptop computers, cell phones, CD's, video cameras, microwaves, iPods, iPhones, and many others too numerous to count. We added two states to our country and made changes in our government. It will be interesting to see where we are 50 years from today.
We have gone away from and returned to many things as a society, aprons were the thing of our grandmother's generation and now they are becoming the thing of our children's generation. We have come full circle in many ways, with many things.
It is interesting what can change in 10 years time, but even more so when you look at a greater span of time, like half a century. I want to reflect more on this period of time and change in my life and our world's life as I look back over these last 50 years of my life and look forward to the next 50.